Are you dealing with anxiety? I am. With all the wacky things going on right now some days I feel like a chicken running around with its head cut off. And those are my good days. Basically, I am the opposite of zen.
I’m a Little Bit Anxious
At this moment, we are dealing with quite a lot. First, forest fires are raging on the West Coast and here in Boulder County. Second, Covid19.
Finally, and most anxiety-provoking for me, a strange election unfolds that has those in authority championing old forms of voter suppression in ultra-creative new ways.
What Are You Doing?
Now and then I stop and say to myself, “2020 what are you doing?!” It’s all just a bit much. But deep down I am mostly worried that these are the good times and that things could get much worse.
Colorado Forest Fires
So, let us begin. As I write this three forest fires are raging around us, two of them within eight miles of us here in Boulder County. The air quality is terrible and it’s too smoky to go outside.
On top of that, it smells like a plastic factory with mothballs in it burned down. Talk about feeling trapped during quarantine. My daily walks outside that sparked great joy are over for now.
But I really can’t complain about being inside my home when so many here in Boulder County have lost their homes and can’t do the same because their dwellings have burnt to the ground.
This makes me more sad and anxious than words can describe.
Covid19
When 2020 began I did not understand certain concepts that were to become key this year. Covid19? Quarantine baking? Fomite transmission? Mask-wearing? People arguing over mask-wearing? These ideas were foreign to me. I only wish they still were.
It all quickly became personal in March when we had to rush home a family member traveling in Europe. In April, we Lost a Loved One to COVID and then had to figure out how to grieve during the pandemic. The only word to describe this is “surreal.”
Now we must multiply our own grief times 223,547 families. That is how many people have died of this terrible disease here in the US. It’s hard not to be in constant COVerwhelm. The devastation wrought by this national disaster makes my own MS Diagnosis look like a cakewalk.
Still, the pandemic rages on and we are told not to fear it. What are we supposed to do? Shut Up and Bake?
In essence, we leave behind the first wave of Covid19 without a coherent national strategy, as we move into the cold weather and the impending, larger second wave.
The Election
Last but not least, we come to the election. I haven’t ever hidden the fact that my husband and I are passionate Democrats, and committed progressives. One thing our family has been enthusiastic about this year is supporting the Black Lives Matter movement.
This commitment applies to equality in all arenas of life. Right now, an extremely urgent issue is guaranteeing equal access when it comes to voting.
Voter Suppression
Unfortunately, this year we have seen an enormous increase in institutionalized voter suppression as the Republican party has gone to war on this constitutional right.1, 2
These white supremacist tactics date back to the Reconstruction era and entail blocking American citizens from the polls.
After the Civil War, poll taxes and literacy tests were enacted to keep Black voters from casting their ballots.3
They’re legit taking the mailboxes off the street. Cheating 101. pic.twitter.com/hkXcV5vtBH
— Isaac Hayes III (@IsaacHayes3) August 14, 2020
The New Poll Tax
Here are some new forms of the old poll tax, as covered by Fox News and other sources:
- 1 ballot box for 4.7 million people in Harris County, TX4, 5, 6
- Eliminate polling places in urban areas7,8, 9
- Remove USPS mailboxes10 and sorting machines11
These exceptionally creative tactics undermine democracy.
Coup d’Etat?
We need to make it as easy as possible for everyone to vote! Not harder.
If only this administration put this much effort into helping its citizens exercise their rights, rather than hindering them, I would not be up at night worrying about a potential coup d’etat.
What Are You Anxious About?
Are you feeling a little unnerved during these strange times when an incumbent says they’re “running angry” and has stated numerous times they won’t accept the results of this election? Frankly, this freaks me out.
What Can We Do?
I love hearing from you all about what you’re going through and how you’re experiencing these times. Leave a comment and let me know how you’re holding up. I want to hear from all of you!
Evie says
Fascinating read. I’m so interested in hearing how things are in different parts of the world esp regarding our juggle with MS atm. Here in Northern Ireland since March routine Neuro reviews are all now by phone, as are MS nurse checkups. I only attend Hosp for 3 monthly bloods (Tecfidera) or annual MRI screen. Oh and flu jab that I had at my doctor’s office in September. Because of the pandemic I went from having an empty nest to all boys returning back home for several months. University closed, sports cancelled and my eldest boy (an optometrist) was put on furlough. My middle boy usually spends his uni break working at a summer camp in upstate NY coaching kids. That was of course cancelled and he was gutted, as were the kids that have got to know him as their councillor at French Woods. My youngest lad then finished his school career with no leaving BBQ or social events. No exams either, just furnished with a predicted grade. He doesn’t want to go to uni just wants to work, so has been trying unsuccessfully to get a job/apprenticeship since leaving school. Sadly it’s slim pickings with so many in search of employment in the lockdowns. Healthwise I’m not too bad at all still doing yoga every morning but it’s difficult to push yourself I think without a group class….which in turn has knocked my confidence with socialising too. Anyhow onwards and upwards look at those beautiful autumn colours !!
Elana says
Evie, thanks so much for reporting in on your health status and that of your family. I too do most of my medical appointments by phone other than PT which has been very helpful for my MS. Working a lot on balancing which is super fun because you really can’t think of anything else when balancing on one foot for 60 seconds straight –it’s not easy. My boys are in somewhat similar situations to yours. These are weird times. And today it is snowing which is stunning to look at. Take good care :-)
Ute Isabell says
Dear Elana – yours is one of the few blogs I always read. Your insightful, smart, empathetic and humane writing is soothing and informative (and, of course, healthy and delicious). Like many Europeans I watch what is happening in your country with concern. We worry that liberal, democratic advancements in equality, health and environmental issues will disappear. (I went to school and lived in the USA and, living in Berlin, am well aware of what you all have done for Europe so this is not America-bashing.) But I deeply hope that the outcome of the elections will be the start of better times for the many!
Elana says
Ute, thanks for your thoughtful comment. I do not take it as America bashing at all. If anything, in the last four years we have bashed our relationships with our closest allies and this causes me great pain. In fact our leader called yours “stupid” when referring to her. For that I can only apologize. Thank you for your support and for holding us in your thoughts during these concerning times.
Ute Isabell says
Dear Elana – thank you for your kind reply! Well, we had planned to spend tonight with the US and British expat community in Berlin, wishing and hoping … but we are in lockdown again so your bean and kale soup will sustain us into the early hours. Fingers crossed!
Elana says
Ute, fingers crossed here too :-)
Ute Isabell says
Yesss! Such good news. I feel I have just taken the first full breath in days! There is still so much to feel anxious about – but right now I feel a little more positive about the world: I sincerely hope you do, too! I will reacquaint myself with my reformer now, please stay healthy and well!
Elana says
Ute, thanks for the reminder to jump on my reformer. And yes, today is a good day for me too :-)
Sara says
I am a big fan of your recipes and your worldview. You were wise to mention the birther movement/lie in a previous response. That was Trump’s original sin as a politician. How could a person build anything great upon a foundation so rotten, evil, and corrupt? I suspect your anxiety and fear comes in large part from empathy. I’m not sure many Trump supporters have that, which is a pity for all of us. I stay sane most of the time by eating well, moving my body, and moderating my news intake (like you, I read my local newspaper). At night, though, I too frequently fall prey to chocolate chips and caramel sauce! Any good replacement recipes for that kind of problem?!?!?!
Elana says
Sara, I could not agree with your words more when it comes to the birther movement. What a profound perspective on empathy, I did not think of that but it now seems obvious. This country has become a bit mean when it comes to helping people who need assistance –whether better education, healthcare, or enough to eat. On another note, OMG I love dark chocolate chips with homemade caramel sauce. Here’s the caramel recipe for you:
https://elanaspantry.com/vegan-caramel-sauce/
Let me know if you’re looking for something else. Happy to help!
Elana
Sara says
Thank you! I can’t wait to try the caramel sauce.
Elana says
You’re welcome Sara!
Laura says
I totally feel abut voting as you do. We went to a very small post office to mail something and the outside mail box was no where in site. This was the day before we heard on the news what was going on. We did not want to go inside. So we went to another location.
People like Laurie just won’t get it, their eyes are closed and so are their ears according to God.
But they will have their eyes open sooner than later.
My policy is to listen and watch, take it in and then do something I totally enjoy. And I pray.
I am so, so, so sorry you and everyone are enduring all of these things.
Thanks for your emails, we are all in this together.
Elana says
Laura, thanks so much for your support. So grateful we are on this path together :-)
Jane says
So sorry to read that hostile and misinformed rant that was directed at you, Elana. I am with you on all counts. The bigotry and hatred that seeped from the depths when this country elected a black president was frightening and beyond belief. I can’t quite get over how we went from having such an intelligent, thoughtful, graceful, and gracious man as our president to someone as uncouth, unskilled and corrupt as the man now in office. This is a crossroads. Either we retrieve our democracy this election despite all the voter suppression-or I fear we lose it permanently, along with any hope of saving our planet and the endangered species facing at extinction.
I’m coping by meditating twice a day, studying healing modalities, donating to causes I care about and candidates with integrity, cooking for friends who are ill, reading novels, writing letters encouraging voters to vote, taking in the beauty around me, walking with my dog, and baking and eating too much. Stay safe and thank you for all you do!
Elana says
Jane, thanks for sharing your thoughts here which moved me deeply. I too have been upping my meditation practice and doing many of the things you also mention. Take good care of you :-)
Alison says
Thank you, Elana. I agree; these are definitely challenging and anxiety inducing times. I too live in the West. The Almeda fire started just a mile and a half from my home. I too am a progressive and look forward to the day when everyone in this country “will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character (MLK). Sometimes that day seems a long way off. Although voter suppression has always existed in this country, the blatant and outrageously open means by which it is occurring now is truly heartbreaking and horrifying. In times like these I remember that “this too shall pass,” and I recite to myself the words of Julian of Norwich, “All shall be well, and all shall be well and all manner of thing shall be well.” I then go bake myself a lovely batch of your Primal Chocolate Chip Cookies. Take care!
Elana says
Alison, great comment in every way! Thank you :-)
Kate says
Elana,
I’m so sorry you were so violated attacked by Laurie.
We will soon take our country back.
She should read Compromised by Peter Sztrok and be enlightened!
Kate says
Correction Violated not violated
Elana says
Thanks Kate, appreciate your support.
Roseanne says
Oh Elana, I understand what you mean. This year has been just one stressful thing after another. We didn’t lose anyone we know to Covid, but the horror and anxiety of it have been overwhelming. We live in the far northern part of NY state, very rural, and have not seen many cases in our county. But we had my brother and his wife and their two teenage children living with us for over four months, teaching and going to school remotely because they didn’t feel safe in their sixth floor apartment in Brooklyn. Becoming a family of six was not an easy thing to do. Then the fires- family and friends in California, Oregon and Seattle living with horrible air quality, go bags packed expecting to be told to evacuate. Now Colorado and you are dealing with it. We lost a three year old cat, the sweetest cat in the world, to what was probably a brain tumor. He went from healthy to gone in less than three weeks. Then a 67 year old cousin died suddenly. This year has been so stressful. I figure Joe Biden has to win the election because something good has to happen this year. And yes, the stress of thinking that we could be stuck with four more years of the destruction that’s in the White House is too much to think about.
Stay safe Elana. I am grateful for you, for your recipes and your way of being in the world.
Elana says
Roseanne, thanks for stopping by and so sorry your year has been this difficult. Thanks also for your gratitude for my recipes and way of being in the world, that is very sweet. Sending you big hugs and you are in my thoughts and prayers.
Carol says
Elana, thanks for your honesty in sharing your thoughts and concerns about 2020. In addition to enjoying my lovely, young music students via Zoom and my precious dogs, I am focusing on gratitude. I actively search out people and events and simple things to be grateful for. Gratitude, for me, is some of the best fuel for daily, sane living. Since I live alone and work alone in a large city, I need strong, dependable fuel to get me through these insane and frightening times. Gratitude pushes out worry. Gratitude co-opts my meanest thoughts. And it allows my brain and spirit to dabble in a lovely reality that radio and television and internet news are not designed to show me. I listen to the news, but I bask in gratitude for all of the good things God gives me daily. May you continue to find peace and joy in the simple things, too. Thanks for everything you do for us in your blog posts and in your inspiring recipes!
Elana says
Carol, thanks for your comment! I could not agree with you more, gratitude is some of the best fuel for living. Mother nature provides a feast for my eyes every single day whether I am inside or outside, and there are so many good things in life to enjoy and be grateful for. Take good care :-)
Judith levy says
Elana-you were spot on . Accurate, eloquent and informative on every point. Thank you so much for your writing. It considerably helped my not inconsiderable anxiety.
Rachel Marie just referred to him as an “epidemiological menace”. As someone who recovered from Covid, I think constantly about all the folks who weren’t so lucky and how angry they must be at a president who lied and obfuscated and continues to do so about the deadliness of this virus. Thank you for your Wisdom.
Elana says
Judith, thanks for this comment and your others. It’s always great to hear from you! I love that you said this article “considerably helped your not inconsiderable anxiety.” I’m always happy to help wherever I can :-)