I started this site shortly after I received a terrifying diagnosis. My goal was simple. To be of service. To make life easier for people with celiac disease and other digestive disorders. Helping others was the perfect distraction. When I started out, I wanted to cheer people up, not bring them down.
I realize now that while I mentioned the diagnosis several years ago, I haven’t shared a piece of myself that matters. The part that went into shock the day I was told I had multiple sclerosis. I’ve dealt with this neurological condition every day since I was diagnosed in 2006. But the feelings that come up are something I haven’t spoken about. Something I’ve been holding in for a long time.
When I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis I entered a strange limbo. For 8 years, my health was good enough. Then, in 2014 things took a turn for the worse and my life since has been full of ups and downs.
Things got bad last year after a trip to Mexico with my husband. Upon returning, I ended up in the hospital with transverse myelitis, numb from the neck down. I remained that way for months.
I’ve spent the entire last year rebuilding my health. Going to Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy treatments 6 days per week, getting physical therapy 3 days per week, receiving intravenous nutrients 1 to 2 days per week, and occupational therapy to regain use of my left hand (my dominant hand) 1 day per week. It was a grueling rehabilitation, and thankfully it mostly worked.
I stuck to my schedule week-in-and-week-out. I missed almost every winter weekend trip to the mountains with my family. I entirely skipped trips to Denver for work. Events such as book signings, TV appearances, and fundraising dinners went out the window. I haven’t been to Denver in well over a year. The geography of my life became extremely small.
In addition to local trips, I also gave up air travel because each time I’ve had an MS attack has been right after an airplane flight. My doctors think the low pressure in planes might affect my brain and nervous system, or that it might be the radiation. Frustratingly, no one understands it. So they told me to avoid air travel. I wasn’t happy about that, but I didn’t set foot on an airplane for over a year.
Last week I went on my first trip in 13 months. My husband and I flew to California. We ate our way through Napa, then we met up with the boys and threw my Dad an 80th birthday party at an adorable restaurant in my hometown, Davis.
It was challenging to take more than a year off and truly slow down. Many people could not understand it and questioned my decision. It took all of both my willpower and my ability to surrender to get well. To give myself the space I needed to heal. To say no to countless invitations for work and play.
I wanted to write about this to give you all a real update of where I am. It might look neat and tidy, and even perfect on social media, but that is far from the reality. Like so many of you, I have struggles both large and small everyday that can’t be conveyed through a photo. I live in limbo, dealing with a major neurological illness, on top of celiac disease, hashimoto’s autoimmune thyroiditis, and several other challenging medical issues.
Although I’m continuing to rest and heal, I live not knowing what’s around the corner. I hope that by sharing this piece of myself I can provide comfort to others walking their own tightrope. Those in the darkest days, dealing with something we are told to hold in. Thank you for supporting me since I started this blog in 2006. I’m so grateful we are on this path together.
Melissa Love says
Dear, dear Elana,
Thank you for sharing. Thank you for providing inspiration. I knew you had some challenges but had no idea of the magnitude. Elana, you are truly amazing.
With your permission, I would like to send you remote healing and add you to my prayer list.
If that does not interest you, please let me know and I will honor your wishes. If yes, I would like to share some more information with you.
Please let me know what feels good and appropriate for you.
Sending much love,
Melissa
LSieu says
Hi Elana,
I am so very grateful for the huge part of you that you have shared with us, echoing the many who have commented on this post, or the ones reading and nodding their heads in agreement. I love the quality that is you and the human experience that you are… the best of the human experience for all that it is, and all that it isn’t. I’m sure you’ve already seen this video with Dr. Terry Wahl’s who created a diet that, in her case, helped to aleviate her MS symptoms https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KLjgBLwH3Wc, and I share it her just in case it might reasonate with others. I was diagnosed with being allergic to 100% of the grasses and 65% of the trees, and you taught me how to bake without grains, which, of course, are the seeds of grasses. You inspired me to look for alternatives and enjoy healthy alternative ingredients to my favorite dishes. So, thank you, for always being as much of you as you can to we the public readers. You’re a joy! And I wish you EVERY joy!
April says
Elana- I would bet that when you shared this to create understanding, you had no idea that you would bless so many!
Five years ago, my life and health started to unravel, starting with my digestive system. Even now I have very limited insight into what is “wrong”… Because several doctors aren’t even sure what’s going on with me. My career, my social life, my world shrunk and shrunk until many days I was sitting or sleeping and wondering when I would be well enough to get out again.
I say all of this because during that season, I found your blog and the blogs of a couple of others you had mentioned. I started cooking again because I needed to “win” at something. And win I did. I began to have more good days and less pain. More energy and more balanced moods. Did making delicious foods that you demonstrated “fix” me? No. Was I miraculously healed? Not really… But what happened is that I had hope and was enjoying little moments again. And my family was seeing me up and around more, and they were elated.
Now, I have a friend who has had multiple chronic diagnoses, and she is starting to read your blog. She is experiencing hope because she feels like someone else has felt what she is feeling.
So without getting too mushy, THANK YOU for being transparent. Thank you for pouring yourself into something that is helping so so so many of us!
You are making a life-changing difference.
Joan says
Your such a “Beautiful person” !
We love you and your brave fight!
with heart and much light…
Joan
Jamie Sue says
Oh, Elana, I have thought of you so often since you wrote about the MS diagnosis. I had no idea that your world had become so limited, and I’m happy for you that you were able to make that trip to California. Thank you for your inspiring posts and recipes. Although I am fortunate to be in good health most of the time, life hands us surprises. There’s no way to know all that you’ve been through, so I’ll just say how impressed I am that you have persevered and continued to take care of yourself and your family, and that you contribute so much to the rest of us via your books and website.
Adele says
Hi Elana,
Have you heard of a book called “Healing MS” by Anne Boroch? Please give it a go. She had full-blown MS and healed herself completely. You obviously know much about healing, but there’s often one little missing step — which turns out to be a BIG missing step — that keeps an autoimmune condition from healing (and many other conditions as well. Most doctors don’t know about it, and many healing and dietary experts such as yourself don’t know about it. But many of us do. The more who know about it, the better off we’ll all be. All the best to you.
Norma McBride says
Elana, thank you so much for being open and sharing your struggles. You have truly been a blessing to me and my family through your blog since finding it a few years ago. Thank you for taking on this little service project back in 2006, keeping you in our thoughts and prayers.
Abby Kranitz says
Elana, your story is one of courage and love and hope. Thank you for sharing it and for being vulnerable and open. As the saying goes “sharing is caring” and you get an A+ for that. My hope is that you can get these AI challenges calmed down and go on enjoying your life and serving this huge community that you have single-handedly created. I am honored and inspired to be a part of it and, hey, I live just down the road from you in South Denver. With love, Abby Kranitz
Paula says
Elana,
Thank you for being brave enough to tell us, your followers, about your health concerns
I was diagnosed with MS twenty four years ago and gave up gluten full food right after my diagnosis. My search for simple healthy recipes is what lead me to your blog. Our journey with MS is challenging, frustrating and often downright crappy! For me, balance in everything is extremely important.
Thank you for your advice and recipes!
Be strong and courageous ? Rest and restorez?
Paula
marcia says
Elana, I was very touched by your article. Up until recently I was in a very similar situation with my health so I understand what you are going through. Last November I came across Anthony William on Facebook, and his new book, Medical Medium. I immediately began following some of his recommendations and my health began to turn around significantly. I was also fortunate enough to get a phone session with him. Now, 6 months later I am almost back to 100%. Spirit talks to Anthony and tells him what is really wrong with people, as most illnesses are usually misdiagnosed, especially MS and Hashimoto’s. His book provides the solutions through specific foods and supplements. I hope you will check him out and get his book because I am confident it will help you. Many blessings.