In mid-March I wrote about the seriousness of COVID19. At that time, I didn’t know it would affect my family in a devastatingly personal way. I didn’t know that we’d be losing a loved one to COVID, and suffer so much more.
2020 Cancelled
I was scared and hunkered down at the outset of March, a bit before life stopped and 2020 was canceled, while many were still traveling around on vacations.
It Was The Worst Of Times
My knowledge and forethought did little to prepare me, or my family for the losses. Here I said “It was the best of times. It was the worst of times.” Now it’s just the worst of times.
COVID And Our Loved Ones
COVID impacts us all with tremendous losses that are far too grave and widespread to detail here. Below are just a few of those my family has suffered.
Losing A Loved One To COVID
One family member is gone. One family friend is gone. Yes, two of our people are dead and will never come back.
COVID Rampant Danger
A robust young cousin suffered from COVID19. It was nothing like a flu. He appeared briefly at our Zoom Passover Seder and 15 days out looked like he had been hit by a truck.
Praying For Our Health Warriors
A dear friend is a nurse on the front lines and shows up for work day after day in New York City while we worry that she will not be given personal protective equipment (PPE). She doesn’t care. She wants to save your life. I pray she will not lose hers.
9/11 x Ten = 30,000 Dead
This virus has killed more than 30,000 Americans. That is ten 9/11s in a few weeks, and the death count marches on. I can no longer bear to hear the word “hoax” in any context whatsoever.
The Opposite Of Preparedness
Why does a simple one-syllable word bring me to tears? It reminds me that the US was focused on “small government” and killed our Global Health Office. It reminds me that while other countries were fighting a battle against invisible terror orders of magnitude more threatening than 9/11, our government was still denying its existence. That is the opposite of preparedness.
Patriotic Americans
This is the moment for patriotic Americans to make time for brave self-reflection. And for grieving. It is a time to understand what it is to be human and vulnerable. To look at what it means to be part of a family. And to look at how we can be better Americans.
A Time For Self-Reflection
This is the time for the patriotism that makes our country great. To look at our mistakes so that we can improve. A time to honor the fallen, so needlessly sacrificed to a terrifying enemy, as our country, ruled by disorganized dysfunction and chaos, allowed it to run rampant. We can do better than this.
Katherine Young says
Elana, I am so sorry. Our son, daughter in law and grandson all had the virus. They were lucky and are fully recovered after almost a month. Alison was on Oxygen for pneumonia, but able to stay home. They are in NJ and we are currently in FL and it was so scary to be so far from them and have to rely on text messages, emails and phone calls. There just doesn’t seem to be any rhyme nor reason for who gets hit hard with this!
So very sorry again for your loss. Your family is in my prayers….
Kate
Elana says
Katherine, so sorry your family is suffering from this. Thank you very much for your prayers.
Janet says
I’m so sorry for your loss. This virus has affected so many in the world.
My family has been deeply affected. My niece and nephew and brother came down with it. My niece and my nephew are both recovering. My brother did not, he went to the hospital on April 8th with a high fever and passed away on the 10th. I know he’s in heaven, and that brings a great comfort to our family. But still he is so greatly missed.
I pray for our president and our Government, I would not want to carry the great load they carry. But Im so thankful to be living in the greatest country on earth.
Pray for all those on the frontlines in this battle. From the baggers at the grocery stores, to the nurses that hold a phone to your loved ones ear as you say your final goodbye in a ICU unit, that you aren’t allowed to be in. I pray that a vaccine is found today.
My heart goes out to those in 3rd world countries or communist countries where a life is just a number.
I wish China had been truthful when this first started, But don’t think we will ever know their death toll.
I pray for Gods peace to be on all those that have been affected by this virus. So thankful that I have His peace.
Elana says
Janet, thanks for your comment. Very sorry for your loss.
kathy glaze says
I am so very sorry for you and your families loss ..A friend of mines brother just passed away with the covid 19 it’s almost like a dream but then you wake up to a terrible reality that you have no closure there was no funeral that you were allowed to attend atleast we have our memories it is indeed a very sad time all over America whether you lose someone or not it’s hitting all of us.We need to pray for one another and for this terrible virus to end soon and never return ..I am praying for God to give you and your family peace through this trying time and keep you safe !
Elana says
Kathy, those are such astute words –it is almost like a dream but then you wake up to a terrible reality. It is a very, very sad time all over America. I’m so sorry for your loss. Stay safe.
Marie D. says
So very sorry for your loss. I truly thank our Awesome God for the gift He has given in our President. Where would we be today without him. My prayer is that those walking in darkness will see a GREAT light.
Elana says
Marie, I’m glad that you are happy and finding hope in this. If only I could too. Unfortunately, given that this administration extinguished the NSC’s Global Pandemic and Bio-Defense Preparedness arm grieves me deeply since it was set up to save lives during pandemics. We have much to learn and it’s ok to be brave right now by looking at how to save lives. That’s what I’m doing.
Marie D. says
Precious Elana: I have been with you for years and have followed you and your family’s move to a home that would be safe for you and your family. You have been through so much and now this. I could not imagine what you are going through now. President Trump did dismantle the NSC but there are now still 110-115 Biological experts at the WH instead of 250 under Obama. Remember H1N1 under Obama. President Trump did act quickly and did save many lives. Let us place the blame where it really belongs. At the feet of Communist China. We tried to send our doctors to China as soon as we heard the news at the end of 2019 but were kept out. President Trump loves this Country and us. Praying you and all your family and friends will be safe. We will get through this. Things started to change at the beginning and through Passover as we prayed the Coronavirus death angel would pass over our Nation.
Elana says
Marie, thanks for sharing your thoughts. I didn’t ever think I’d say this, but I wish we had been prepared and handled this the way South Korea did, such an absolutely incredible job in testing and clear, consistent messaging to the public from the outset moving forward. My family member died during Passover, I wonder if he would still be here if we had not gone the route of Italy. So many choices and so many lives lost. I am devastated by the suffering.
Aztechan says
Elena,
I am so deeply sorry for your loss. Death is too familiar to me these days. I’ve recently lost a very dear friend. She left behind her two children (there is no father in the picture) and my heart just breaks for them.
As far as the humans that have sent you angry emails and have unfollowed you, I have two things to say about that—
First of all, it’s their loss not yours. You are an amazing, generous, kind-hearted, helpful, conscientious being. Personally, you have been an incredible source of knowledge and inspiration for me and thousands of others. You don’t want those people following you anyway.
Secondly, my father always told me to “let the rain roll of your back like a duck”.
I’ve got you! And only those that really matter have your back, too!
Sincerely,
A. Pettus
Elana says
Aztechan, thanks for your kind words and support, and sorry to hear of your recent loss. Very, very grateful to be on this path with you.
Aztechan says
You’re welcome and THANK YOU again!
I, too, am very grateful to be on this path with you.
Please take great care of yourself.
Sending you big, virtual hugs! :-)
Elana says
❤️
Karla says
Marie, I hope one day you will see the light and understand the true meaning of Christ.
Kristy LaFollette says
I am so saddened to read your loss, Elana. We just spoke not long ago. It’s all of our loss and dammit, we have got to get this country –this planet– in a place of evolution and innovation, not one falling back into the Dark Ages. I’m disgusted and disheartened that millions out there still refuse to connect the dots to a global pandemic and their personal ability to be responsible. Make change to close disparities. Helping others is helping oneself, we learn this as young children! We need to stay connected and keep healthy, strong and positive…otherwise the a**wipes in power will continue to hold power. I love you and your fam so much. xoxo
Elana says
Kristy, thanks for your words of support.
Linda says
I am so sorry for your loss. I have also lost a dear friend to the virus and my heart is broken. I’m just disappointed that you would use this opportunity to express your political views. More than any other time in our country, we need unity. There’s plenty of blame to go around as far a preparedness, including at the individual hospital, city, and State government levels. But this is not the time to blame. Eventually, our entire country will have to take stock of “lessons learned” and that’s a good thing. But people need to remember, this is a “pandemic”. No country any where in the world was, or could be prepared for every catastrophic event, including a virus.
Elana says
Linda, I look to South Korea as an example of how to deal with this pandemic incredibly effectively and find inspiration and hope in the way they handled it. We have much to learn.
Cheryl says
Thank you for your courage. Thank you for saying what many believe but few have the platform to voice. Wishing you good health, and peace. And love.
Elana says
Cheryl, thank you for your support. I have received angry emails from longtime readers unfollowing me due to this post, so am extra grateful for your kind words.
Rhoda says
I’m so sorry for you loss.
Elana says
Thanks Rhoda.
Barbara says
Elana, I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing this reality. Sometimes I wonder if people realize the tragic impact this virus is having on our society. I am so thankful that I found your blog so many years ago. I feel like you are a good friend even though I have never met you. Thank you for all your wonderful recipes, thoughts, and hard work to help others seek healthy natural alternatives for their health.
Take care and God bless you.
Elana says
Barbara, thanks for being a good friend and being on this healing path with me.
Ruth says
Elana, I’m so sorry to hear of your loss – long life!
I am from Australia, Sydney, and our government has been doing the right thing, thank goodness. There has been criticism from some circles about the restrictions, but hopefully these people stay in their homes!
My husband and I are both in our 70s and appreciate everything being done.
We are heading into Winter, which is a cause for concern, but hopefully our numbers do not spike.
I hope that your government sees some sense, one person in particular, and your deaths start to fall.
Thinking of you
Ruth
Elana says
Ruth, thanks for checking in from Australia. Totally agree about needing some sense here. I just wish our country wasn’t so viciously divided about that. Long time readers have sent me emails saying they disagree with this post and are unfollowing me. The division is tragic.